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  <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava</id>
  <title>dkrikava</title>
  <subtitle>dkrikava</subtitle>
  <author>
    <name>dkrikava</name>
  </author>
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  <updated>2007-04-05T23:27:11Z</updated>
  <lj:journal userid="2233732" username="dkrikava" type="personal"/>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:20031</id>
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    <title>Hit and run</title>
    <published>2007-04-05T23:27:11Z</published>
    <updated>2007-04-05T23:27:11Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Hi all!  Just checking in!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Bye all!</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:19894</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/19894.html"/>
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    <title>Flaptacular!!!</title>
    <published>2007-01-29T18:58:04Z</published>
    <updated>2007-01-29T18:58:04Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Damn!  Why can't my flingle glarb my shiznit?  It's always such a freakin' flangnabular that it just makes it impossible to ratch my jumtop.  What's not to understand?  How many times do I have to explain this to you?  Do not walk on the flasters!!!  Keep off of the snaprivets, dammit!  Then again, I haven't had a good frangmanijubulant in a long time, so who am I to pontificate?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;CROMULANCE!!!  CROMULANCE!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;S'what I'm talking about...</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:19584</id>
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    <title>WTF?</title>
    <published>2007-01-15T21:59:28Z</published>
    <updated>2007-01-15T21:59:28Z</updated>
    <content type="html">One of my coworkers participated in a local radio station contest for a Nintendo Wii last Friday.  The contest was to drink as much water as you can before going to the bathroom.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;She died a few hours after she left the radio station from what coroners are calling "water poisoning."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Who'd a thunk it?  This woman worked in my building and I saw her on a daily basis, though we were never close.  I've heard about dying from drinking only water while you are running or exercising due to electrolyte depletion and lack of salt in your system, but just drinking a lot of water while sitting around?  In all my 37 years on this earth I have never once heard that one can die from drinking too much water too fast.  Apparently, no one at the radio station had either, so I am not alone.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.breakingwindows.com/new/2007/01/autopsy_finds_s.php"&gt;http://www.breakingwindows.com/new/2007/01/autopsy_finds_s.php&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;That's just wrong!  Aside from the absolute absurdity of how she went, she left behind 3 children and a husband.  She was 28 years old.  "Tragedy" doesn't even begin to describe what happened.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I don't know what to think or how to feel, but for some vague compelling reason I felt I had to share this with someone.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:18678</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/18678.html"/>
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    <title>Yup!</title>
    <published>2006-06-21T21:47:40Z</published>
    <updated>2006-06-21T21:47:40Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;table width="350" align="center" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"&gt;&lt;tr&gt;&lt;td bgcolor="#E6E6FA" align="center"&gt;&lt;font face="Georgia, Times New Roman, Times, serif" style="color:black; font-size: 14pt;"&gt;&lt;b&gt;Your Birthdate: May 13&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/font&gt;&lt;/td&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&lt;tr&gt;&lt;td bgcolor="#F2F2FB"&gt;&lt;center&gt;&lt;img src="http://images.blogthings.com/whatdoesyourbirthdatemeanquiz/birthday.jpg" height="100" width="100"&gt;&lt;/center&gt;&lt;font color="#000000"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;You're dominant and powerful. You always need to be in charge.&lt;br /&gt;While others respect your competence, you can be a bit of a dictator.&lt;br /&gt;Hard working and serious, you never let yourself down.&lt;br /&gt;You are exact and accurate - and you expect others to be the same way.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Your strength: You always get the job done&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Your weakness: You're a perfectionist to a fault&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Your power color: Gray&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Your power symbol: Checkmark&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Your power month: April&lt;/font&gt;&lt;/td&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&lt;/table&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.blogthings.com/whatdoesyourbirthdatemeanquiz/"&gt;What Does Your Birth Date Mean?&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:18273</id>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2006-04-25T15:04:00</title>
    <published>2006-04-25T22:43:41Z</published>
    <updated>2006-04-25T22:43:41Z</updated>
    <content type="html">I commute every day to get to work, about 45 minutes to an hour, depending on traffic.  The road I travel on would best be described as country-side, mostly fields and orchards.  I have to go through one town (Wheatland) and one small community (Sheridan) to get to where civilization starts (Lincoln - Although one could argue that the word "civilization" is very loosely translated when it is used in this context.)  Just before I get to Lincoln, on the left hand side of the road, there is a small wetlands area where I have seen on two occasions a large leafless tree filled with snowy egrets at sunset, a beautiful tranquil scene that never fails to ease the stress of my commute.  I have come to identify with this small patch of wilderness so close to where the "real" world begins, hanging on to it's own identity and just doing it's thing like it has probably done for hundreds of years.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;About 3-4 months ago, I noticed a wooden damn had been constructed about midway through the wetlands area which made the water level in one half drop dramatically and created a small lake in the other.  It took a few weeks for this to fully register on my commute-addled brain that this was a beaver dam!  I have always thought beavers were pretty cool little creatures, and having never seen one up close in the wild, I started watching the progress of this little dam every day on my way to work, my own little 6 second commune with nature on a daily basis as I drove by.  I watched day after day as the rains filled the small lake and overflowed the little dam, and noticed that even the worst downpour did nothing to damage the overall structural integrity of the dam.  I was mightily impressed that this little creature had stood up to the worst mother nature has thrown at this area in many years, and after the rains had passed, the dam was still there, no worse for wear.  I also noticed what I first thought was a flaw in this structure was actually a spillway created by the beaver to keep the level of his/her little pond steady.  Damn beavers are cool, and bet this one never even went to school to figure out how to do this either!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Today was the first time I have actually ever seen my little beaver, and I wish I never had.  His dead bloated body lay inert on the side of the road, no doubt the victim of a passing car sometime the night before. I suppose it was inevitable, living this close to a highway, but it made me sad.  Now I will bear witness to the slow degradation of the dam as the builder will no longer be there to keep it in working order.  I would like to be able to say something about how it reminds me of my own mortality or the futility of life, but I can't.  Maybe I have already made peace with these concepts so I don't feel the need to dwell on them when these thing happen.  I don't know.  It just makes me sad to see such a thing come to pass.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Looking back over this post, I am trying to find a reason I feel compelled to write about this.  I think I just feel the need to write some kind of obituary for my little engineer and in so doing provide some recognition of what his passing meant to me.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:18061</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/18061.html"/>
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    <title>Random Quotes</title>
    <published>2006-03-10T17:33:34Z</published>
    <updated>2006-03-10T17:33:34Z</updated>
    <content type="html">"A man should look for what is, and not for what he thinks should be."  Albert Einstein &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."  Lao Tzu &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"&lt;insert your="your" name="name" here="here"&gt;, sooner or later you are going to realize just as I did, that there is a difference between knowing the path, and walking the path ..." Morpheus&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"Okay, slick. But let me tell you something about all your skills. As of right now, they mean precisely... dick."  Agent K&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;"Gotta do what you can just to keep your love alive" Jackson Browne</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:17183</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/17183.html"/>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-11-14T21:06:00</title>
    <published>2005-11-15T05:10:20Z</published>
    <updated>2005-11-15T05:10:20Z</updated>
    <content type="html">I breathe in and you fill me&lt;br /&gt;I close my eyes and you fill me&lt;br /&gt;I open my mind and you fill me&lt;br /&gt;I open my heart and you take me</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:17036</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/17036.html"/>
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    <title>Awww crap!  Now what do I do?!?!?</title>
    <published>2005-11-08T03:12:14Z</published>
    <updated>2005-11-08T03:12:14Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;table width="250" align="center" border="1" bordercolor="black" cellspacing="0"&gt;&lt;tr&gt;&lt;td bgcolor="black" align="center"&gt;&lt;font style="color:white; font-size: 16pt;"&gt;dkrikava's LJ stalker is dkrikava!&lt;/font&gt;&lt;/td&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&lt;tr&gt;&lt;td align="center" bgcolor="white"&gt;&lt;font style="color:black; font-size: 12pt;"&gt;dkrikava is stalking you because you got better results for the 'acronym' thing than them. They are also getting with your significant other!&lt;/td&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&lt;/table&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br&gt;&lt;form method="POST" action="http://www.go-quiz.com/stalker/stalker.php"&gt;LiveJournal Username:&lt;input name="uname"&gt;&lt;br&gt;&lt;input type="submit" value="Who is your LJ Stalker Friend?"&gt;&lt;br&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/form&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.go-quiz.com/stalker/stalker.php"&gt;LJ Stalker Finder&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br&gt;From &lt;a href="http://www.go-quiz.com"&gt;Go-Quiz.com&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/font&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:16793</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/16793.html"/>
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    <title>House stuff</title>
    <published>2005-10-04T23:55:32Z</published>
    <updated>2005-10-04T23:55:32Z</updated>
    <content type="html">We achieved house this weekend!  Oooodalolly!</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:11913</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/11913.html"/>
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    <title>House stuff</title>
    <published>2005-06-06T22:33:06Z</published>
    <updated>2005-06-06T22:33:06Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Woo hoo! We now own a concrete pad, some dirt, and a poorly constructed frame...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Hmmmmm...we took a look at the progress this weekend, and at first glance it looks mightily impressive.  Framing is mostly done and we even have plywood on our roof.  It almost looks like a house now.  But as we walked through it, I couldn't help but notice the split studs, the multiple "shiners", and general haphazard look of the actual framing.  (BTW a shiner is when the nail doesn't hit what you intended to hit and is hanging out generally not doing what a nail is designed to do.)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Oh well, I take a deep breath and figger that this is just how it goes and there is not much I can do about it.  And anyway, we have the "framing walkthrough" scheduled to happen soon and I can point this stuff out then.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;On a brighter note, "The Man" once again put in an appearance, but this time I was ready, armed with the mighty "Business Card of Shut-the-Hell-Up" that I got from the sales rep before we went to look at our house.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Security guy:  "You are supposed to check in at the office and get hardhats before you come out here."&lt;br /&gt;Me:  (Pulling the card while humming the "Good Bad and the Ugly" theme song)  "Janice in the office gave me THIS and they are out of hard hats."&lt;br /&gt;Security guy:  "Oh, then I guess it's alright then."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;*Sigh*  Of course it's alright, you ninny!  This card protects me from falling lumber AND nails in my foot so of course it is OK to be walking around without a hardhat.  Wattadork!  But he left us alone to take whatever risks we saw fit to take and went on his merry, if clueless, way.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, we have achieved frame!  Yay for us!</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:11391</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/11391.html"/>
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    <title>First attempt at SCA Poetry</title>
    <published>2005-05-31T17:41:55Z</published>
    <updated>2005-05-31T17:41:55Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Sun pounding down on my helm&lt;br /&gt;Draining my strength&lt;br /&gt;Armor drenched in sweat&lt;br /&gt;The aroma of battles past and present&lt;br /&gt;Fear tightening my guts&lt;br /&gt;Death in his eyes as he closes on me&lt;br /&gt;Tensing as I throw blow after blow&lt;br /&gt;Blocking, dodging, weaving&lt;br /&gt;Contact!  The dull clang of his helm&lt;br /&gt;The look of surprise and rage in his eyes&lt;br /&gt;My enemy falls into the dust&lt;br /&gt;I am left standing&lt;br /&gt;Arms shaking&lt;br /&gt;And for that one brief moment&lt;br /&gt;I am the King of the World!&lt;br /&gt;Then I do it again...&lt;br /&gt;Until I can fight no more&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;-Brandr Viobjorn</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:11217</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/11217.html"/>
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    <title>V is interviewin' today...need good thoughts</title>
    <published>2005-05-26T18:37:49Z</published>
    <updated>2005-05-26T18:37:49Z</updated>
    <content type="html">V had an interview this morning and is heading for the second level interview in about a hour from now,(she was so good in her first interview that they didn't want to wait to get her in for the next one!  Does she rock or what?!?!?) so she needs everyones good vibes sent out this way!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Everybody think good thoughts!</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:10925</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/10925.html"/>
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    <title>Home news</title>
    <published>2005-05-25T15:58:28Z</published>
    <updated>2005-05-25T15:58:28Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Well our purchase has been upgraded from "dirt" to "concrete slab surrounded by dirt."  V and I went to look at it a week or so back.  We wandered around and walked on our slab, then decided to walk through the unfinished neighborhood to see if we could find our model in a more complete state.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Then "The Man" showed up and kicked us out.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Security guy: "You know you two are trespassing."&lt;br /&gt;V: "We actually bought one of these houses that are being built."&lt;br /&gt;Security guy: "Technically you don't own it yet."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;What a cocksucker.  His reasoning is of course that if we are walking around the construction site and get a nail in one of our feet then we can sue the housing company, which is a valid concern.  I hate the fact that the morons of the world have done this to me.  *I* know that if I am walking around unfinished houses that I need to be careful and if I get a nail in my foot it's my own damn fault.  But the "morons" of the world who refuse to take responsibility for their own actions have made it so that I can not go out and look at my new slab without getting harrassed by some idgit in a security uniform.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Ok done ranting.  Happy about our new slab.  More to come.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:10456</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/10456.html"/>
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    <title>What do I do?</title>
    <published>2005-05-10T18:34:03Z</published>
    <updated>2005-05-10T18:34:03Z</updated>
    <content type="html">My brother's roommate's mother passed away on Sunday.&amp;nbsp; We didn't
really know the mom, but my brother has been living with said roommate
for over 15 years, so she has become a part of the family.&amp;nbsp; She
has given so much to our family, and I don't know how to react to the
news.&amp;nbsp; I want to be supportive, but she has never been a person
that openly shares her emotions with others.&lt;br&gt;
&lt;br&gt;
I guess I'll just stand by and see how this goes.&lt;br&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:10089</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/10089.html"/>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-04-27T08:55:00</title>
    <published>2005-04-27T15:55:38Z</published>
    <updated>2005-04-27T15:55:38Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;table align="center" border="1" bordercolor="black" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="2"&gt;&lt;tr&gt;&lt;td align="left" bgcolor="#D8FF00"&gt;&lt;font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" style="color:black; font-size: 12pt;"&gt;Your Porn Star Name is: &lt;b&gt;Private Dick&lt;/b&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/font&gt;&lt;/td&gt;&lt;/tr&gt;&lt;/table&gt;&lt;br&gt;&lt;div align="center"&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.blogthings.com/pornname.html"&gt;&lt;b&gt;Get your own Porn Star Name&lt;/b&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:9874</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/9874.html"/>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-04-22T14:50:00</title>
    <published>2005-04-22T21:50:08Z</published>
    <updated>2005-04-22T21:50:08Z</updated>
    <content type="html">&lt;a href="http://www.wiredreflection.com/tests/magic.html" target="new"&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img src="http://www.wiredreflection.com/tests/druidm.jpg" border="0" frameborder="0" alt="You are a Druid!"&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br&gt;&lt;br&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Take the &lt;a href="http://www.wiredreflection.com/tests/magic.html" target="new"&gt; "How Do You Use Magic?" &lt;/a&gt; test!  Written by &lt;a href="http://www.wiredreflection.com"&gt;Brimo&lt;/a&gt;</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:9630</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/9630.html"/>
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    <title>Happy anniversary my love!</title>
    <published>2005-04-22T18:09:44Z</published>
    <updated>2005-04-22T18:09:44Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Sunday marks the one year anniversary that V agreed to abandon all common sense and spend the rest of her life with me.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Thinking back to that absolutely gorgeous day and all of the wonderful people that attended and helped make it such a beautiful event...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I haven't seen most of those people since then, and that makes me sad.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;To V&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Thank you for being who you are and accepting who I am.  This last year was great, but I feel that the best years are still to come.  As we work together to build a life and a family, I often reflect on how every day we seem closer. I feel as though our souls are entertwining one small tendril at a time, like the roots of a young tree tenaciously building a solid base in order to survive the coming years.  You can't see the roots grow, but the resulting connection between tree and earth steadfastly weathers any attempts by outside forces to bring it down.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I look forward to many years of weathering storms with you, as well as spending countless days basking in the sun and wind as we strengthen our bond with each other.  I am a better man for having you in my life.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I love you&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Bear</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:9338</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/9338.html"/>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-04-15T09:23:00</title>
    <published>2005-04-15T16:38:30Z</published>
    <updated>2005-04-15T16:38:30Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Yay we own a chunk of dirt!  But it's our dirt dammit!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Everybody is of course welcome to come out and see our dirt, although it may be better if you wait until we have concrete and wood and pipes and stuff on it.  Our front yard gets grass and a tree as part of the package.  Our back yard would get the same for the low low price of 8 grand.  Needless to say, we're buyin' grass seed.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;We went into the design studio a week or so ago and picked out our options.  We were actually able to stay under budget and get everything we wanted.  Everything, that is, from our "B" list.  Our "A" list, the stuff we would REALLY have loved to get (ie hardwood floors) would have increased our loan by 15-20%.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;But we got some damn nice vinyl, 9 ft ceilings, decent carpet with the mega super carpet pad, oak cabinets, ceiling fans, nice appliances, and a garage door opener with 2, count 'em, 2 remotes.  Oh yeah, and a big 'ol concrete pad out in the backyard.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The excitement and stress mount on a daily basis, but the supposed "move-in" date is so far away that the daily increase is almost imperceptible at this point.  I say "supposed" because I have heard too many stories of "things" happening that prevent the happy new homeowners from moving in, from permit problems to construction delays.  We shall see...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Anyway, we own dirt.  Yay for us!</content>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:9092</id>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-03-01T15:40:00</title>
    <published>2005-03-02T00:01:58Z</published>
    <updated>2005-03-02T00:03:03Z</updated>
    <content type="html">This Saturday is it.  We go to the development where our house will be built, point at a dirt lot, sign a check and a contract and we will have...a dirt lot.  The rest of the week is all about getting our finances in order, which will be fairly simple as we have no finances.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Loan officer: "We will need to see your last 2 pay stubs, last 2 years W-2 forms, and last 2 months bank statements"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Me: "Bank statements?  What, to prove we are spending every last f'ing dime to get into a house and that for the next 30 years you will have us by the short hairs?"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Loan officer: *Laughs* "Something like that..."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Me: *Not laughing*&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Given the fact that I have recently quit smoking, my sense of humor concerning selling my soul to the bank is at an all time low.  I should be excited, but I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop and get the call saying "Sorry, you didn't qualify after all" or "We found out about the time you spent in a Turkish prison for selling Levi's on the black market in the early 80's.  This won't affect your loan in any way, but we're going to whisper about you a lot when you aren't looking."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Mostly I am just waiting for my half empty glass to spill what little it is holding into the dry earth never to be seen again.  Just ask V; I am being downright militant about not getting excited about buying a new house.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;V: "Isn't this exciting?  We're going to be in our own new house!"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Me: "It hasn't happened yet" or "We don't know for sure" or "I'm not going to get excited until we move in" or "Are you gonna eat the rest of that sandwich?"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Real joyaholic me...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I guess that deep down I know that if I don't get my hopes up too much then I won't get hurt as much when I get let down.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I s'pose it will all be more real this Saturday after we get what we are looking for and have signed our lives away.  Maybe then I will allow myself a little victory dance.</content>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:8810</id>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-02-24T16:05:00</title>
    <published>2005-02-25T00:21:22Z</published>
    <updated>2005-02-25T00:21:22Z</updated>
    <content type="html">V and I have finally decided to take the plunge and buy a house.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Welcome to financing hell!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Loan agent:  "Sure we can get you 100% financing.  It'll only cost you $9,000 to get into a home with no money down."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Distraught perspective home-buyer (played by yours truly): "..."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;First time home-buyers are really in a jam to come up with 5-10 thousand dollars just to get in the door on a new house, at least out here in California.  I've heard of all these wonderful programs for first time buyers, but I haven't seen anything wonderful yet.  I wonder if the loan officer will take chickens in lieu of hard cash?  I know where there is an unguarded chicken ranch just ripe for the plucking. (collective groan)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Barring committing fowl crimes (more groaning) we will most likely have to beg, borrow, and beg to come up with the minimum "no down payment" fees to get into our new house.  I will probably spend the next few weeks honing my groveling skills to a fine edge so that none will be able to resist!  So it's not like we don't have a plan...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;More to come...</content>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:8563</id>
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    <title>Coming up on week 8...</title>
    <published>2005-02-23T20:03:14Z</published>
    <updated>2005-02-23T20:03:49Z</updated>
    <lj:music>Santana Winning</lj:music>
    <content type="html">Yep, 8 weeks without a single puff.  On the 7 mg patch at the moment, which I have noticed does not cause me to panic when I forget it like the 14 mg patch did.  My mood does not change all that much and I don't miss it terribly.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Thanks everybody for your support (and chocolate!)</content>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:8286</id>
    <link rel="alternate" type="text/html" href="http://dkrikava.livejournal.com/8286.html"/>
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    <title>OOOOhhhhhhbaaaaby!!!</title>
    <published>2005-02-15T21:58:38Z</published>
    <updated>2005-02-15T21:58:38Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Dark creamy goodness...you melt in my mouth...slick velvety sweet carresses as you melt on my tongue...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Thank you for the awesome awesome AWESOME chocolate Keith!  You made my day (week, month) here at work!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(I'm going to make some chocolate this weekend with the cacao nibs.  I'll let you know how it goes.)</content>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:8118</id>
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    <title>emails from the dark side</title>
    <published>2005-02-14T17:31:00Z</published>
    <updated>2005-02-14T17:32:27Z</updated>
    <content type="html">As you are all probably aware, I have quit smoking.  During my trials and tribulations however I have noticed that when I deprive myself of nicotine by not wearing the patch, I am less than pleasant to be around.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I sent an email last Friday afternoon to some coworkers in response to an issue I am having at work.  At the time I had valiantly attempted to not wear my patch for the last 2 days.  Needless to say, I was not in the best of moods, so the email was less than "polite".&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I sent a retraction this morning, letting everyone know why I wasn't in the best of moods and briefly explained that I had quit smoking and wasn't wearing a patch that day etc. etc.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Surprisingly enough, I received an email from a coworker who is thinking about quitting and wanted to know if the patch worked...poor guy, I don't think he was prepared for my lengthy response.  Below is his email and my response...&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;==========================================================================================================================================&lt;br /&gt;MY FIRST EMAIL "RETRACTION":&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;My apologies to everybody.  I recently quit smoking and Thursday and&lt;br /&gt;Friday were the first days without my Nicotine patch.  Made me kinda&lt;br /&gt;cranky by the end of Friday, and I regretted sending this email right&lt;br /&gt;after I sent it, but I couldn't take it back.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I know everybody is working hard to solve this problem.  Just let me&lt;br /&gt;know what I can do to help from this end.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Sincerely&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Dennis&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&amp;gt;&amp;gt;&amp;gt; "Employee name ommitted" 02/14/05 8:21 AM &amp;gt;&amp;gt;&amp;gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Does the patch work? I am wanting to quit myself, but do not know anyone who&lt;br /&gt;has tried the patch.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;RESPONSE:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt; To be honest, I don't really think so.  The problem is that the patch is only replacing the nicotine in my system, and the nicotine is the most addictive part of smoking.  I am afraid now that I have become addicted to the patch.  When I don't wear it, my mood shifts so dramatically and quickly that it scares me, and I turn into a very unpleasant person to be around.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I've done some online research and found statistics that state that the most successful quitters have done so without any kind of patch or gum, around 91% of all long term quitters.  Only 7% of people who have quit successfully use the patch or some other form of nicotine sustitute.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I am 6 weeks into the patch program, with 2 more weeks to go with a lesser dose patch starting on Wednesday.  I'll let you know in 4 weeks if it worked or not.  At this point, I know that I am going to have to face down the mood swings once I quit the patch entirely, so my goal is to be prepared and make sure the people around me are prepared as well.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The only good thing about the patch is that you won't be taking in all the other bad stuff when you stop smoking.  But I am learning the hard way that it takes a lot more than just slapping on the patch everyday.  I have learned that it takes having a plan on dealing with the cravings and the inevitable mood swings, and to make sure the people around me are aware of what I am doing and are supportive.  It will be just as hard on them as it is on you, and they need to understand that when you are breaking an addiction like this, you will be a different person for a while.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I stongly encourage anyone to quit smoking, and to do it as soon as possible.  Even the last 6 weeks without smoking has been great for me.  My throat doesn't hurt, I don't wake up coughing every morning anymore, and I can smell the world around me again, not to mention the fact that I don't stink of cigarettes anymore.  (One of the first things you will notice when you quit is the nasty smell that smokers have after they have had a cigarette.  This smell lingers for about 10-30 minutes after someone has a cigarette.  You will become very sensitive to it and wonder how you never noticed it before).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I found a lot of good information online.  Do some research and find out the best way for you to quit.  The one thing I haven't done yet but I am seriously considering is joining some kind of support group.  Quitting is one of the hardest things you'll ever do, and I've noticed that people who haven't tried to quit smoking really don't understand just how hard it is.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;It hasn't been easy, but it has definitely been worth it.  The first step is wanting to quit, which it sounds like you do.  Make a plan, pick a stop date, let everyone know, warn your coworkers and family members, decide what you are going to do when the craving hits, and do it!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Sorry for the long email, but I have become a kind of "Born again" non-smoker, and I'm ready to preach to any that will listen!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I hope you decide to quit.  I promise you won't regret it!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Dennis</content>
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  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:7752</id>
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    <title>V not doing well...</title>
    <published>2005-02-04T00:36:46Z</published>
    <updated>2005-02-04T00:36:46Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Everbody send your good and healing thoughts to V please.  She has the flu something fierce and it's really laid her out.  Of course this happens when we have approx. 13 relatives showing up this weekend to celebrate Chinese New Year.  I think we may have to cancel that.</content>
  </entry>
  <entry>
    <id>urn:lj:livejournal.com:atom1:dkrikava:7530</id>
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    <title>dkrikava @ 2005-02-01T11:48:00</title>
    <published>2005-02-01T19:50:11Z</published>
    <updated>2005-02-01T19:50:11Z</updated>
    <content type="html">Woke up late...fergot patch cause I was in a hurry...snapping at coworkers and doctors...patience for stupid questions wearing thin...</content>
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